Thank you Lord for answering the prayers!!

Well I am back from the doctors, and we got the news we wanted to hear. There is no evidence of the hemotoma!!! They spent over and hour on the ultrasound, and they did not see any blood. I am still spotting though, so I have to be on bed rest until that goes away. They said that it is just colored discharge, and that it should go away. But, I can go to eat and stuff, so that is nice. The hemotomoa could still come back, so I will continue to pray that the rest of my pregnancy goes well. All the measurements were good, and that babys heartbeat was strong. We are so happy!!! Thank you to all who have prayed!!!! We greatly appreciate it. God has given us this blessing!

Well another thing we learned, is we are going to be proud parents of a boy!!! We are having a son!!! I was very surprised! Actually, I thought from the beginning we were having a boy, but everyone else convinced me we were having a girl...with all the trouble and such, the heartbeat, and all the ultrasounds...so when they said boy, we were shocked!!! We are very excited, and would be happy either way. But now I know that I have my son growing inside me. So please continue to pray for our son and us...I am halfway there!!! 20 more weeks to go!

Big Day!

Today is the day I have been waiting for now for 6 weeks...today I get an ultrasound! This was suppose to be the ultrasound that told us if we were going to be proud parents of a son or a daughter...while that still holds its truth, the more important part of this ultrasound is to see if the hemotoma has shrunk and is away from the placenta. I have been praying for 6 weeks straight that we get our miracle and that everything is going good. I am sooooo nervous. We want this baby more than anything we have ever wanted in life. We have been ready to be a mom and dad now for 3 years. I just pray God protects this blessing he has given us, and that we hear the good news, and that come September, I will be giving birth to a healthy baby boy or baby girl! More news to come....

My family rocks!

Yesterday my awesome mom came and stayed the day with me. She had to work, but she did it at my house. It was so nice to have her here with me. It got my mind off of what is happening to me. I knew if something went wrong, she would know what to do. My mom went through this when she was having my sister. My sister was born healthy, so that gives me hope. My mom made sure I ate all day...I am not a good eater when I am nervous, and I am trying because I am eating for two! Thanks mom for everything you have done for us!!! We love you greatly!

TOday, my brother is going to come and spend the day with me. He will be working too, but having him here will be nice to keep me company. Plus he is really funny, and my dog LOVES him. Kona will be happy when he is here!

Last night, Bob came home and wanted to make me a special dinner. Since I cant even look in the kitchen, I had no idea what it was until he brought it to me. He made me a citris chicken, with some red potatoes seasoned sooo yummy, and brown rice, and some garlic bread...it was YUMMY. I have the best husband in the whole world. He is such a blessing. I love him to death! Thanks babe!

Here I go again!!

So, I started to bleed more last night. I hate this because it is like a waiting game. I dont know what is going to happen. So many things can happen, and ofcourse they go through my mond day and night. I was so hoping that I was going to be getting the good news on Thursday, and now, I just dont know. I mean maybe we will...maybe this is the last of it all coming out...I can only pray and hope so...This truly is in God's hands at the moment. Why is it so hard to trust the one Person who we have to rely on..the one Person who has given us life, and has a plan for us?? I find my self struggling with this, and I know I need to trust God, and know He has a plan for us. I do think He wants us to be parents. I mean, I have wanted to be a mom since I was about 5. Each day and night, I find myself repeating the same prayer over and over and over again. I thank all the people who have been praying for us...it truly means the world to us.

I want to give a shout out to Holly....thanks for the awesome cookies and for coming and spending time with me. It means a lot. I promise when I am off of thie bed rest and back on my feet, I will be helping you, along with everyone else!!

When will this stop?

Well it is monday, and today, I am 19 weeks pregnant. I am very blessed for this. However, I was really hoping that I would have NO spotting by now. I dont know what to think. I had stopped spotting red for a while, and then last week, it started again. I am not a doctor, but I try to reason with myself. I think sometimes that if it is coming out, then that is good, it means it is shrinking. But then I think to myself, well if it is red, then that means new. So I dont know. I will find out on Thursday though if it has shrunk at all. I can only pray that it has. I know I will probably have to be on bed rest still though to make sure it doesnt get bigger and that it heals all the way. I am willing to do whatever it takes to keep my baby safe. I dont think I have ever been so scared in my whole life. We do find out if we are having a boy or girl though, so that is exciting. I think we are having a girl...and would be very surprised if they tell us we are having a boy.

Well please pray that we get good news on Thursday...I really want to be healthy and I cant wait until September when this baby will be born healthy!!!

Living on Faith

Dear God,

Please help me heal. Please keep our baby safe, and growing strong. Please help the hemotoma shrink and absorb. We are ready to be parents! Please Lord, make this week be the best week ever!

In Your Sons Name,
Amen

Need some Prayers!!

Well, I will be 19 weeks pregnant on Monday! Wow, we have made it this far, and for that I am very thankful for, and feel very blessed. I went for almost two weeks with just slight spotting, and no red blood...which again, I feel very blessed for. About a week ago, I started to get slight bleeding again. Now, it usually ends quickly and is followed by either nothing, or brown spotting. Ofcourse, this completely scares me! This coming Thursday, we have an ultrasound. This was a scheduled U/S to measure our baby and to find out if we are going to be proud parents of a beautiful daughter or handome son. Since they discovered the hemotoma, this U/S can tell us if it has shrunk and is getting better. With the new bleeding, I dont know what to expect. I have been researching and researching like crazy...trying to see if I can find anything. I found some people who said they did bleed and then it all ended by week 20...it came and went, and then was gone. So, I am praying with all I have that this is the case, and that we will get the greatest news come Thursday...ofcourse I am totally freaked out. I just ask that you keep us in your prayers, and I thank you all who have been.

A big thank you to Bobs parents!!! They came to visit and were so very helpful...not to mention good food!!!! We wish they lived closer and could come over more often...hopefully I will be healed and we will be visiting with their grandchild in November!!!

couch potatoe

Well, I am still on bed rest. I went to the OB on Monday, and we heard the babies heartbeat. It was a nice 165! The doc said I have to sta yon bed rest, and that the high risk doctor will make hte decision on when to take me off. Next week I have an ultrasound where hopefully we will see that the hemotomoa has shrunk or maybe even dissapeared! I pray all day and everyday that they tell me it is gone and that everything will be ok from here on out! Some days I spot more than others, so the doc said the fact that it has slowed is a very good sign. It always seems though when I get excited, and think I am in the clear, that I will spot red...however, it does go away quickly, so I should think that is good. I am trying to stay positive, and due to my family and friends who have been here to support us, it has made it easier to be positive.

Bobs parents come today. I am excited to see them. His brother and Carrie ( his gf ) come tomorrow. We were all suppose to go to a wedding in Jacksonville this weekend for Bob's cousin, unfortunatley I cant go. Bob isnt going either. It will be nice to see his parents and have some company for a couple of days.

My awesome mom cleaned my house yesterday. She knows how I am when guest come, so she wanted to help out. I hate being waited on, so I owe so many people when I am finally off of bed rest.

well there is not much more to report. Hopefully next thursday I will have good news for everyone...thank you for all the thoughts and prayers!

My Best Friends Wedding

No, I didnt go to a wedding, and my best friend isnt getting married...but I have watched this movie 4 times in the last two days!!! I love this movie, but I really wish that they would have gotten together in the end, but oh well, it is still a good movie. This movie reminds me of being in high school. It was my junior year, and my friends and I would always stay the night at our friend Cassie's house. We would sneak out and toilet paper houses...we would do this almost every weekend. Then, Cassie got mono, and all the fun ended...one, she couldnt stay up, and two, none of our parents wanted us to get it, and three...well yeah, we got caught sneaking out too, so that fun was over. But one thing was, we would watch this movie all the time. I dont know why, and I cant actually remember who had the movie and such, but I know Cassie had the soundtrack. I dont know...we were crazy.

One other thing I remember is we would make videos. My friend Stacey and I thought we would be on Saturday Night Live sometime...weird thing is....I dont talk in front of crowds, and I am pretty shy, so why I imagined this, I dont know....but Stacey and I made this hilarious video....well it was hilarious to us. I remember laughing so hard while we were making this...I think we even called it Tuesday Night Live...you know, because we were actually going to be on Saturday Night Live...oh I miss those days...I miss my fwend!!!!

Anyways, things are going alright over here. I am still on bedrest. I am going onto my 5th week. I go to the doc on Monday, and then the high risk doc next Thursday for an ultrasound. PLease pray the ultrasound shows that my hematoma has shrunk, and that our baby and I are going to be just fine. I do feel her move all the time...so that is good, and my baby bump is getting bigger. I say her because I truly think we are having a girl. We have had so many ultrasounds, and in two of them we saw her cute little but, and she spread her legs, and there was no boy part...but they cant really tell us until the next ultrasound...so we will see. I dont care what the sex of our baby is, I just want a healthy baby and a healthy mommy!!!! Please continue to pray for yus...thank you!!!! We appreciate it!!

The War of a Rib Roast Bone

My brother came over for lunch today and brought me some yummy Quiznos! When he comes for lunch, he takes Kona out of his kennel and takes him to the bathroom and lets him play around a little. Usually, when he leaves, he puts Kona back in his kennel and shuts the door. Well today I was feeling bad for Kona because he cried for half the morning, so I decided we could try and keep him out...if I really needed help with him, I have friends near by who can help. So, my brother grabbed a rib roast bone ( dinner for Easter ) out of the freezer and placed it on Konas bed in front of me. Joe leaves, and now it is just Kona, Marley, and I. Marley...well I didnt even know where Marley was...he usually is sleeping around somewhere. All of the sudden Kona is crying...he isnt barking...just crying...I was thinking how could this pup be possibly crying when he has real meat in front of him. He then gets up, and backs away. To my amazement, Marley the Beast comes walking out from under the side table and heads right at the bone. I tell Kona to not let him do that, so Kona starts to bark, and then the hissing and swinging starts. I watched in amazement...Kona is 70 pounds heavier then marley, so I wasnt worried about Kona. I let the war go on for a bit longer and then I realized that Kona was actually getting angry, so I just dropped a pillow and Marley ran away. Kona grabbed his bone and turned his back to the cat. It was pretty funny...like two siblings fighting...although I dont think my mom would have allowed us to continue to go at it...pretty funny stuff....but then again...that is entertainment to me lately!!

Did I mention I have the best husband ever...he came home last night with colored pencils, erasers, pencil sharpener, and a drawing pad...he figures since I cant do anything, atleast I can go back to doing one of my hobbies of drawing...I drew a plant today...fun stuff...thanks babe!

And a great shout-out to Holly...she came to visit yesterday after school. Thanks...its nice to be able to have people to talk to and watch tv with. Thanks so much!

Day 26

Well I now have been on bed rest for 26 days. I think the hardest part of it is being alone and having time to think about everything that is happening. I am tired of watching tv...I swear they just play the same things over and over and over again. And why does the movie channels play murder mystery's....alll the time...it is dumb!!! I want to watch some romantic comedies or something! Anyways...I keep busy watching movies from netflix ( they go right to the XBOX, which is pretty nice), I also now have the book that was recommended to me, and I have magazines. YEsterday, Tammy came over and we watched tv and ofcourse looked up broadway stuff and american idol stuff! Thank you Tammy for keeping me company!!! Yesterday, we kept Kona in his cage and he did a great job. That is good, because we didnt know what we were going to do if he wouldnt stop barking. My parents could take him, but then he would be gone for a week at a time, and well, we would miss the crazy thing. He is such a good dog though...he ended up going crazy at about 4:45, so on a trip to the bathroom, I let him out. He just sat at the front door and didnt move until my brother got here. He is in his Kennel right now, and hasnt made a sound...good boy!

Again, I want to thank all of you for your thoughts and prayers...they mean so much to Bob and I...it helps us get through this difficult time.

Stacey and Sarah

Wow, two posts in one day!

This is a special post for two great friends of mine. Stacey and I have been friends now for almost 15 years. We have been through so much together...she truly is a great friend. I met Sarah through Stacey almost three years ago, and she as well is an awesome person. Since Bob and I have moved down here, every year the two of them have come and visited for Spring Break. We always have fun plans, and ofcourse the beach is one. Last year we went to Sea World ( those of you who know us, know why we went to Sea World...LOL ) We got soaked from rain, but still had such a blast...because no matter what...we always find a way to have an adventure!!!! This week has been such a blessing!! These two amazing friends came down here knowing that my life at the moment has been on a couch! WOW, have they truly helped out. I think Bob is a little excited knowing he gets a little break too! Between cooking breakfast, lunch dinner, taking care of wild man Kona and even help cleaning...it has been such a great blessing...Thank you so much Stacey and Sarah...next week is going to be painful without you here...Stacey even cleaned out my refrigerator ( I am kinda ODC when it comes to organization...so that was like one of the best things ever)

Anyways, thank you Stacey and Sarah....I cant thank you enough!!!! Please come back and visit soon...especially when the little one is here healthy!

Life on a Couch

It has been a while since I have written, and so much has happened. For one, we are finally pregnant again. With as much joy that this has brought us, it has brought us much fear as well. We were very excited to complete our first trimester...we celebrated with actually looking at some possible things we would want for this brand new bundle of joy that has been wanted for so long. We even went and bought some maturnity clothes...as I was starting to need them. The day after I started my second trimester, I woke up bleeding...this was the worst possible thing that I could have inmagined. To much surprise, our baby was fine, with a stoung heartbeat, and the bleeding stopped right away. A week later, it started again...and once again, our strong little one was growing and moving around. They couldnt see where the blood was coming from, but there were thinking there was a hemotoma, which apparantly happens to some women...a small percentage, but based on our history here, we arent surprised! So I was placed on bed rest, and the bleeding got better, then it started again, and back and forth like that. I went to a high risk doctor who discovered that I have a large hemotoma, and possibly a tear in the placenta. Then we heard the dreaded words we did not want to hear..."you have a 40% - 50% chance of a preterm labor, and possibly have the whole placenta tear away from the unterine wall." This was not what we wanted to hear...our little is growing so well, and they have such a good strong heartbeat..we have already fallen in love with this little one, and this news was just a major shock to us. I had already been on bed rest for almost 3 weeks at this point. I was told to continue bed rest, and that this doesnt mean it wont clear up, but that I need to be careful. Our first thought was to look this information up, and to see what was really happening. Well we did dicover that it is not good to have a tear in the placenta, but we did learn that many women have this happen, and they go on to have healthy babies. We also learned that most hemotomoas absorb themselves and bleed out by week 20. So, that gives me 3 more weeks, and hopefully that is what happens. The good news it that everything else looks great...our little bundle is measureing a week ahead, and has a strong little heartbeat. So, this is where we are today. I spend my days and nights on the couch, watching all kids of movies. There are days where I am happy, and ready to face this without fear, and then there are days where I am terrified, and all I do is think about our situation. One thing that I am trying to do is remember that God is here for me, and that He isnt going to hand us something we cant handle. He has a plan for us, and I need to accept that. I think this has broughten us a lot closer to God...I dont think I have ever prayed so much in my life. Deep down I feel like I am going to be ok, and we will have a healthy son or daughter in september...but it is hard, because I dont want to get my hopes up so high, to only be let down. I just have to keep living on faith.

Through all of this I have learned a couple of things:

First of all, I have the greatest husband anyone could have ever asked for. I have been blessed with the most caring and understanding husband. He has been here for me through all of this, and has made sure that I am in the mot comfortable position. I know this has got to be so hard on him, and he never lets it show...he has been so awesome, and has just really shown me how lucky I am to have married my best friend...I thank God for him all day!

Second, my family. They have been so awesome. My parents make sure that I am getting lunch and dinner when poor Bob has to work. They even come over here and cook for all of us, uncluding some of our friends. Again, God has blessed me with such a great family. Bob and I are very blessed with great parents and siblings...and although Bob's parents are not down here, I know thier thoughts and prayers are with us daily...and that means the world to us! My brother has been such a blessing as well. He has really made sure that both Bob and I are taken care of and that our dog ( who is hyper and still a puppy) is watched and cared for, so that I dont have to worry about him while I am here on the couch. Thank you Joe!

Third, my friends...wow do we have some great friends. Holly and Jason have been kind enough to keep Kona at their place during the day, and even watching him in the evening until Bob or Joe can get him. People I work with have been great, emailing me such great words of wisdom, and their prayers are just very warming to Bob and I. Knowing that so many people care about us and our little bundle make Bob and I feel very blessed. Tammy, has been awesome...I do not know what I would do without her. She has visited and called almost everyday, and is making sure that I get enough food ( I have lost 8 pounds...ooops...doc says its ok) Tammy's prayers and inspiration really help us get through some tough days. Thank you so much Tammy, and all of you who care so much for us....again, another sign of how blessed we truly are.

I have just realized that God has really blessed us with some great people. I am a very lucky girl in so many ways. Yes, this is scaring, and nervous, and boring...but the final outcome will be a healthy baby, who we can always look at and realize that God definately loves each and everyone of us, and truly does have a way of showing us we are blessed.

I will try to keep this updated more often...as honestly, I dont have much else to do :) I thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and help during this time. Please continue to pray...as all of you in our thougts and prayers daily!